The Fuck You Chronicles

Entry: 09-10-00 ---2:00pm

Sun, 10 Sep 2006 23:38:54 GMT

[Private to Self]

Sleeping in never felt so fucking good. Ma wasn't around to interrupt me.
I wonder if she’ll be back like she says. Pa better not even think, not for one god damn minute, that I’ll fill in until she gets back, if she don’t come back with him. Stupid stronzo.

No luck in fucking Hogsmeade. I’m starting to fucking hate that place. First Dicklick, then the bloody cunt licker Malfoy. What next? That place is filled with nothing but fucking retards. And in the Hogs Head no less.

What- do I gotta go into stupid Madam Puddifoot’s to escape all the cunts of the world? Watch, next I’ll run into chump Woody, and then the fucking Hogsmeade experience will be complete of all my childhood memories. Now I know why I hated this goddamn place. At least Rome had some good spots to score. And I’m not about to go crawling to that faggot Morsus either. God damn it!
Whatever, I’ll be a raging alcoholic then. What’s fucking new.

I need to get Derrick back for his bitch arse stunt. And his little whore Parkinson. God. How the fuck did that tightwad ever score with her?

[/Privato]

[Private to Dipshit]

You never told me Parkinson tasted so good.
And I forgot to tell you that we swapped spit. She tastes as good as she looks. Mmmmm….

Wonder if she’s busy tonight.

This isn’t over. Not by a long shot.

[/Private]

[Private to Parkinson]

I bet you are lonely and unsatisfied right now.
I can’t get your body out of my mind.
You should tell me where you live, so I can get another taste.

Derrick's wrong for you Parkinson…. I mean the man can't stop the likes of me, as you so eloquently threatened. You’d be better off with someone…oh, say… me.
You know you want me. I know you do.

[/Private]

Entry: 09-01-00 --- 2:00pm

Fri, 01 Sep 2006 21:19:14 GMT

[Private to Self]

I swear to fucking god Pa’s getting on my nerves! I knew it was going to go this fucking way. I knew it. Doesn’t even give me the god damn courtesy of a week. One more fucking week… is that so much to ask? An extra day is too much, apparently.

What the fuck ever. Guess I better go out in style, before I report to his motherfucking office come Monday goddamn morning. I wonder if I could fuck it up.
I need to fuck something up……

[/Private]

[Private to Dick-lick]

So… you really didn’t miss me, did you? No Owls with invites to dinner, no messages. Nothing. I haven’t returned so you could ignore me. I’m sure as shit not going to ignore you old pal, old buddy, old chum.

Never fear, I’ve been pretty damn busy anyway.
Places to go, sluts to fuck. You know how it is…
No. No you wouldn’t, would you? You wouldn’t know a thing about any of it.
I know you don’t get out much; I can’t seem to find you around.
And fucking… well, I bet you have problems with that too, yeah?

Get out of your fucking cave, big boy, else I may end up forgetting about you entirely.
Who’ll care about you then?

Flint
[/Private]

Entry: 08-31-00 ---- 12:00pm

Thu, 31 Aug 2006 14:31:59 GMT

To any business owner’s out there who own one of these things:
Anyone looking to hire new employees?

[Private to Self]

The almighty hunt for work is going fucking nowhere. And Pa’s got shite situated for me to be his bitch again, but I bled another week out of him. Still… it’s already fucking Thursday. I think I got about up until Saturday to get a bite, or it’s off to waste my life in his image. Fucking hell.

I’m not sure if I wanted to come back or not, but whatever. Derrick’s out and about. I’m surprised he’s still around being a fucking loser. No- that’s not much of a surprise, he is a fucking loser.
I had him too. Fucking cocksucker. He’s lucky I don’t feel like jerking around.
I need to get his arse. Need to remind him of his place.
Wonder where he’s staying at….. I’ve not seen him in Diagon or Knockturn, so I wonder if the dumbfuck even works.

And Knockturn is fucking empty! I couldn’t find Edgar, and no fucking sign of Higgs… the fucking place is a goddamn ghost town! What the fuck happened while I was gone?

And- Parkinson.
What a fica…hhmm…puttana…
Though I can’t believe I run into her now, in Knockturn of all places. In front of a goddamn tattoo shop. I wonder if she’s missing the feel of a tattoo…. Nah. She’s to smart, or stupid, to have gone that route. Yet…two years. A lot has fucking changed.
Man, does that girl have some nice tits…
She’s another mystery. I should try to find out what the fuck is going on, has been going on.
I should try to fuck with her too. Fuck her. –Yeah….

I go to fucking Hogwarts, just like Pa was all up in shite about, and run into the whore from Paris! Now that’s a mindfuck if I ever had one. Doing her again made me think about Paris…fuckingfagcity. I don’t really appreciate the flashback from hell, but she was a decent fuck…so… I did need it. After Derrick, and Parkinson…. And fucking Morsus dicking off on journal… she was…. Fuck- her name… something like a color? Lily.. Lilac… fuck, well something gay like that.

[/Private]

[Private to Pukey]

Hey.
Have you seen Derrick around?
Have you talked to him?
I saw the fucker last week…
Same old prick.

M.M. Flint

[/Private]

................
*Added later in the evening*

[Private to Self]

It's Lavender. Fucking Little whore told me herself. Huh... what kind of name is Lavender? She's definitely not pureblood, that's for sure. Whatever. She wants to see me again. What do I fucking look like.... some kind of buddy-buddy, bullshite? Yeah but she was decent. Hhhmm.
[/Private]

Entry: 08-24-00 ---- 3:00pm

Thu, 24 Aug 2006 18:54:12 GMT

I went to Italy for two bloody years, and all I learned was this: Italy sucks arse. A load of sciocchezze. I also learned a bunch of Italian curse words.

[Private to Self]

Finally! I'm home.
Stupid fucking trip! I don’t know why Pa didn’t put his damn foot down on the idea, but whatever, Ma’s a bitch. If Pa's so hard up for money, he should just take it. I don't understand how Mamma Leonettie is still breathing. He could fix that problem, real quick. But he's weak. Whatever. Just goes to show how fucked up this family really is. Stupid fucking Italians!

I lost my goddamn job too. Pa told me I was better than a mere assistant, but what the fuck does he know anyway? Nothing. Not a god. Damn. thing.
Means I must find another one now. Better start looking tomorrow, or just get out of the house under the assumption I'm looking.

Now what the fuck do I do now? Can’t fucking live with my idiot parents, but I can’t afford a stupid place yet. Pa will be all: ‘Stay here until I find you something.’ Which will royally suck, cause I will not work with that coglione again! Go ahead and put me under Imperious Pa, and make me a mindless Zombie. But I’m eating your flesh afterwards. Fucking cockface.

Wonder what the blokes I use to know are up to. Whole lot better than me, probably. We should have never left. Now I’m as lost here as I was in Rome.
Stupid cunt of a mother.

I need to get fucked up- pissed arse drunk. Maybe find a good blow… then I could think clearly. Wonder if there are any available applicants for a good one. I could always go back to Italy on occasion and get a talented whore with Pa’s money. Use it all up. Eh, been there, done that. For two motherfuckingarsehole years!

I need fresh lips. Raw…. Bloody? That’d be Sweet.

[/Private]

[Private to Slytherin classes of 86-93]

Cheers all you fuckers!
Guess who’s back?! ME!

Now, who wants to welcome me back to bloody England properly?
Where’s my damn welcome wagon?!

M.M. Flint

[/Private]